My Work Situation

I always had this picture of consultants as people who go from client to client sharply dressed giving away awesome presentations and talking about ground breaking stuff. But off late or rather since joining this company I realized that this weird idea is so far from the truth that it is laughable. I never do any of those things. I work on seemingly everything under the sun. I have worked on consumer business, education, real estate and now technology. One day I would be taking to some slick private equity guy and the next I would be waiting in line in a government office trying to fix up a meeting with some non-descript bureaucrat.

I am a power point presentation expert. That’s all I can claim to be after almost six months of working here. And I can sort of make a lot of weird models on excel. These are my USPs. There is nothing concrete or something unusual that I find out. Its simple common sense and the worst part or if you look it from my company’s perspective the best part is people pay seriously big bucks for this work. We look around the net to find blasé details about the industry, dress them up neatly in these presentations and that’s how we roll.

There is a sense of dissatisfaction because I never get to know what happens next after I toil for two months, making all these projections and models. Did the company finally accept what we told them? If so is making any difference? I worked for the jelly drink project (okay seriously no laughing, I am actually proud of the work that I have done!) and now I just wait for them to launch, which from what I have heard will take at least 5 years to materialize. So, for all intents and purposes I just did a lot of work on something which may never see the light of day. What’s the point to all this? All I can claim is that I made a killer deck.

But there is one other thing that I have mastered: Lying. It is an integral is part of what we do; we collect data from everyone under the sun the name of market research by telling them stories which will never have an ounce of truth. I have become such a professional liar; it just comes so naturally now. A year ago, it was so easy for people to find out when I was lying because I could never keep a straight face but now I am Master Yoda of lying.  

As you can see I am learning very important life lessons from my job, lying and building castles in the air. Pretty perfect combo if I may say. Anyways, I am just pissed off today so the rant. My lovely roommate has decided to take a break from work and is bunking office for this whole week so the project she is supposed to be working is on my plate. I have to work now for the next three weeks and the worst part I have to travel all the way to freaking Powai. Oh the joy!