My Birthday

Its official now, I am old. I am 25 :(. It’s like in that novel Veronica decides to die, I have had all the great experiences in my life, everything’s going to go downhill from now. Not that I had so many “great” experiences, I have had my shares of ups and downs, happy memories and not so happy ones. All in all it had been a happening life or so it seemed to be. I am not committing suicide or anything. Just so you know.

If you have read my blog, you would know my birthday has always been a sore spot for me, from being almost stood up to thrown out of pubs to celebrating the whole day in an auto I had really great experiences. But this time it was not like that, my roommates threw me a surprise party, which actually was a surprise. They bought me a cake, P landed in our PG with another cake and she bought me Nina Ricci. I went to Comedy store to celebrate with P and RS. We had a great time, drinking and laughing till our faces hurt.

You know that there is a “but” coming, don’t you? I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I am so restless about everything that is going in my life right now. I like my job, it has its own drawbacks but the work is good and it’s actually interesting sometimes. I live in a great city. There are so many things that I could do. Company is not a problem, P is always there and with her, her posse of HelLites. But for the life of me I cannot get excited about anything. It’s like I am dead inside.

I went shopping for my birthday. I went to Zara, FCUK, M&S, Vero Moda and blah blah blah. I used to love shopping once upon a time. A new dress would always make me happy, however bad my mood was. But, now I couldnt muster enough enthusiasm to even try. There I was in the place that could make me happy, just by going there breathing in the air not six months ago and now I just don’t care. Even P gave up on me.

I have no idea what to do. I am not interested in anything. I come back from office, change and just settle down on my bed and stay there for the next three hours making inane conversation or watching some random shit. And then the whole cycle repeats itself.

Should I start taking some anti depressants or something? I don’t know why I am being so melodramatic. I am dead on my feet and still I can’t stop writing. I will get out of this mood soon and come up with a more cheerful blog.

Untill then

P.S. It's just the birthday blues talking, let's just forget about this post