My Road to Nowhere

I am left with almost a week before I join in Chennai. To be honest, I m not even thinking about my job right now, it’s the last thing on my mind. All these days I had a concept of going to an office and then coming back home. The part in between is always hazy and I never ventured to research in this area. I left it to my future self to take care of because I m too busy enjoying my solitude (N I finally figured out which side of the line I m on). But off late most of my friends who have already joined are filling me up with the job details. It’s like knowing the whole story of a movie before you walk into the theatre, I don’t like to know that. And this movie I m quite sure is not going to be one of those comedies.

So now is the part where I have to be really serious and start packing. But all I m doing is watching that 70s show all over again. I recommend this show to everyone because it has like the complete package: its funny, has some fabulous osts and not too long like 24(you don’t actually have to touch the scroll bar at all to fast forward anything). Talking about 24, which by the way is by far the most funny-drama I have ever seen I mean it will win that award every year if the Emmy’s had a category for such shows. I wish I work in CTU just to get a look into that cool bag Bauer(they call it the jack sack!) carries around. Ok I lost track of topic, whenever I start talking about 24 I have to comment about something or the other or I will just die J

Anyways I was invited to a Dinner party at one of my neighbors a few days back. Generally we don’t have much of these kinda things in our apartments. People just keep to themselves at least in our floor which works really well for me because I don’t want inquisitive aunties talking about stupid stuff from studies, job to tutoring their children who are preparing for JEE. Of all the 32 apartments we have here I know at most three families and one of them was having the party. Now there I was at around 10 at night standing with a bunch of teenagers chatting about some stupid stuff. I dint even try small talk. I just stood there talked to the person next to me about some random stuff and came back.

It felt like as if the whole IIT thing has changed (maybe I think that’s the reason) my whole thought process that I always feel like an alien. I can’t chat even with my best of school friends for more than 10 minutes because we have absolutely nothing in common. They go on discussing about issues that are so juvenile; I simple can’t stand the whole charade. I often make plans to meet them but in the end sit at home and read a novel. I think it’s a much better way to spend time than going and meeting a bunch of friends who have become more or less strangers.

It’s something that has never interested me. It may not be a typical IITian trait because I have seen very few people back in Roorkee who actually enjoy their moments of solitude. The most memorable times I had in Roorkee were in my room watching some crappy movie (I m writing this in every post because I miss my room like hell). I don’t even remember the movie but the feeling matters it’s as if I m free, free from everything. I was watching Easy Rider a few days back. Jack Nicholson is really awesome in this movie btw. He talks to these two on the road bikers—he says to them:

“What you represent to people......is freedom. Freedom's what it's all about. But talking about it and being it......that's two different things. It’s real hard to be free......when you are bought and sold in the marketplace. Don't tell anybody that they're not free, because they'll get busy......killing and maiming to prove to you that they are. They're going to talk to you and talk to you......about individual freedom. But they see a free individual; it's going to scare them. Well, it don't make them running scared. It makes them dangerous.”

All in all, what I m trying to figure out is are we free in our own world or are we trying to just follow what people have done so far and ape them. It’s as if someone already made a road for you to walk on and we have to just follow it until a point and then settle down. This line of thought is very dangerous because at some point of time most of us realize what we are doing is a far cry from what we wanted to do.

P.S. Do watch Easy Rider it’s a kick ass movie…ost is amazing..great acting as usual from Nicholson and Hopper. In the end Hopper tried to give it a French new wave kinda look which failed a bit ( for me at least) but it’s a classic after all.